Interfaith Marriage in Islam

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The number of Interfaith marriages around the world are on the rise. People are becoming a lot more open minded and tolerant of other faiths, but what does Islam think about marrying a non-Muslim?

Interfaith Marriage in Islam

The General Rule of Thumb
According to the Quran, Muslims should NOT marry people who don’t believe in Islam.

Do not marry unbelieving women until they believe. A slave woman who believes is better than an unbelieving woman, even though if she attracts you. And not marry (your girls) to unbelievers until
they believe. A man slave who believes is better than an unbeliever, even though if he attracts you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the fire but Allah beckons by His grace to the garden (of bliss) and forgiveness, and makes His signs clear to mankind; that they may receive admonition. (Quran 2:221).

And I’m not even going to get started on the comparison to slaves… I will leave that for another post where I will write about slavery in the Quran.
In addition to not allowing interfaith marriages, most families prefer not to even let their children marry anyone from a different country. Even if they are Muslim. They like to keep it within their culture and traditions so they don’t have to worry about “inter-cultural” differences.
Exceptions for Men
The Quran later “revealed” an exception that was directed only to the men. To me, it is more like a contradiction, because it disagrees with the law in the previous verse. The exception says that men are allowed to marry “people of the book”, generally known as Christians and Jews. I guess they feel that the two religions are close enough to Islam to be considered ok.

Lawful to you in marriage are not only chaste women who are believers, but chaste women among the People of the Book. (Quran 5:5).

What About the Women?
Of course, there is a double standard in Islam…. again. As usual, the women are left behind, because according to Islam, women cannot marry anyone that is not Muslim…. no matter what.

Excuses Given by Muslims

Muslims always come up with many excuses that “explain” why women don’t get the same rules as men. Here are some of the things they say:

• The man is always the head of the household so his religion is always what the family follows.
• Women are “weaker” emotionally so if she marries a non-Muslim man, she will be influenced by him and she would be more likely to change her beliefs.
• When they have kids, they will always go by the fathers religion (I guess they didn’t know that Judaism is based on maternal lineage. The mother determines the religion of the children).
• They just don’t want to be influenced by non-Muslims.

The Reality – How People Deal with their Interfaith Relationships

Because of these religious laws, many couples are faced with making a really difficult decision. They usually have three choices:

1. They can just break it off and forget about getting married.
2. The woman can marry a non-Muslim anyway and face the consequences. I think that in most cases she will be at least disowned, but this can really vary depending on where she lives.
3. The man can “convert” to Islam. That way the woman does not have to choose between her family and the man she loves. I have to say that this is a popular option, because no one wants to lose their family. It’s just sad….

It just seems that Muslims keep figuring out ways to make life difficult for their people.They have to be in control so they can make sure Islam keeps growing by gaining new converts or having little Mini-Muslims running around. Muslims also think they are better than others so they have this great fear of being “influenced”.
Aren’t we supposed to try to bring people together to make this world a better place? Instead, Islam drives people apart and makes non-Muslims think that they are not worthy.